I’m not entirely sure if I am still feeling ashamed or if I can safely admit that I’m proud. I completed Jane Eyre tonight. I spent most of my time while reading this book amazed at the modern feel of some of the ideas and personalities found in this story. I completely forgot that this novel was written over 150 years ago.
I was having trouble finding the true sense of a love story until I reached the last few chapters. I could get a sense of love that Jane felt for Mr. Rochester but I could sense that she felt he never quite helped her be the woman that she wanted to become. This was the same realization that Jane went through when faced with a second marriage proposal. She questioned every aspect of marriage if it only meant being what someone else’s ideas were about her. She was definitely a feminist after my own heart. She questioned everything and never settled for less than what she desired for herself. When she finally searched out Mr. Rochester in an effort to clear her anxieties about him, she discovered the many hardships he had endured since her departure from his home. Upon laying eyes on him again Jane’s love was restored and made anew. They both needed hard times and room to grow before they were put in the right place to fully love each other. This is where I wholly and completely appreciated this love story.
As far as my conflicting feelings go, I’m saddened and ashamed by the fact that it took me over 5 weeks to finish one book. On the other hand, I’m immensely proud of myself for finishing my first book of the year. To make up for my timing and to keep my morale up, I’m going to stick to some smaller books for my next few self-appointed assignments. I haven’t decided yet what exactly I’m going to read next, but I’ve got several options. I’ll decide by tomorrow and let you know.